I don’t do sit-ups, I do sit- downs and I stay down for 2-3 episodes. Exercise to me is crunching (leaning forward) to get my cup of tea. Or arm extensions (opening the fridge). So you can understand my frustration when I am forced to squat especially after I pay 25 cents. I am talking about how Italy has full-functioning toilets but no toilet seats. Toilet seats can’t be more than what, five euros? I see the metal hooks for it already there, mocking me. So just do me a solid, so if I need to do a solid I will be able to.

Put that thing back where it came from or so help me.